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Sharing Our Stories

general spiritual coaching

The phone rang. I picked up the receiver. It was my long-time friend who called to inform me of the passing of her husband a few weeks ago. At first, she just told me when and where and why. As I embraced her story, she began to tell of her journey through the last months of his life. Listening, I felt the gentle opening of a rose, as each petal unfolded, each incident revealing itself in its depth and beauty.

In those few minutes, I walked those months with her. She was able to relive those moments of pain, humor, frustration, hurt, and love – not caught up in those moments, but rather seeing them now through the eyes of wonder, appreciation, frustration, anger, and absurdity! As she talked, I began to feel her tension slowly release, and our hearts began to sync with each other.

I became aware that her underlying story was really my story too. Love, loss, rejection, anger, helplessness, denial, unrequited love – yes I know those feelings all too well. I thought I was the only one experiencing that! I was surprised to find that her story was so similar to my own, though different in detail.

Through her sharing, I received a whole new insight into community. She had no family nearby, so her friends filled the gap and became the family she called upon when help was needed. She would think through her friends and remember someone who had knowledge and talent that matched her need. These friends were more than happy to come to her aid. She trusted that she would be supported, simply because it was needed. And she was.

In sharing her story with me, we both grew and changed. She explored many of the details of her experience, releasing tension and relaxing into our shared space. I felt so grateful for her friendship and trust, and was amazed to realize that I am not alone in my own story. We are all part of a greater community that surrounds us with compassion. But the only way to really discover that is through offering ourselves and our vulnerability to others who can embrace our story, and giving them our full attention when it is time to be with them.

Our stories bring us closer together, in a shared humanity, living out our challenges and triumphs day by day. We wouldn’t know what we all share in common unless we tell our stories. And when we do, we move closer to that greater love as our hearts soften toward each other. Somehow their stories give us a chance to see life from another point of view, and understand how we each choose the decisions we make. We become more alike than different, more sympathetic and compassionate.

Here is a thought! If we all are willing to share our stories, as imperfect as they may be, and are also willing to listen to others’ stories with a resonating heart, there could only be peace! Imagine a world of cooperation, where stories are told and listeners embrace the stories with unconditional love. The sharers find relief and release, while they both find oneness and community rather than isolation.

I invite you to share your stories with trusted people in your own life, and here at Radiant Soul Salon. And also practice deep unconditional listening, without opinion or judgment, with your friends and family. My vision for the Salon includes an opportunity for each person who visits the Salon to be heard – to tell their story to another who will embrace it and grow themselves from the listening. We all have stories to tell, and the desire to be known and loved. That is an awesome gift to give to another, and to receive for ourselves.

In the near future I will be offering a class to teach you specific skills for compassionate listening. I am so excited for the opportunity to share with you the ways I have learned to honor another’s story, and to grow in the process.

Stay tuned!